5 posts tagged “qotd”

How would you like to be remembered?
Submitted by Paulha66.

Did I die and nobody told me?

Well, this is a dull answer, but first and foremost, I'd like to be remembered as a good mother.  This is likely my immediate response today because I'm in the midst of raising a preschooler and toddler and although at the end of every day I'm convinced that it's not possible to be torn with indecision, doubt, and guilt one ounce more than I am already, I wake up the next morning and prove myself wrong.

So, given my sleep-deprivation, my preschooler's increasing tendency to be as rude as humanly possible to everyone around her (and rarely ever sweet anymore), my toddler's increasing tendency toward aggressive physical behaviour to others (yes, he is THAT kid in the playgroup), and my total loss as to what to do about any of it, I just don't have much energy left to worry about accomplishing anything else. 

At this point, my only goal in life is to help these children become successful adults... and if they are then remembered for great, world-changing things, that's all I want.

But really... ask me again in five years.

What was the #1 song on the radio when you were born?

I wasn't going to post an answer, but I went to find out the answer to satisfy my own curiosity, and the results were kind of interesting.

The #1 song on the day I was born was "I Can See Clearly Now" by Johnny Nash. 

For one thing, I absolutely love the song. 

But what's neat is that it's one of the two songs that G and I used to make efforts to sing to our baby-to-be when I was pregnant with M.

And to top it all off, it was the song that happened to be playing on the radio in our room when that very same baby was born. 

How far from your last home do you live? Why did you move and are you glad you did? 
Submitted by Matthew 25.

I'm not sure how to answer this question, since I'm not sure when I last had a place I could call "home," and in fact, I'm not even sure I'm "home" now.  I'm pretty picky about what gets that label.

Before moving into our current house, we jumped around a lot, living in 6 or 7 different places within a span of 3 years.  Some of those places were in Pennsylvania, the rest in Toronto.

Although 3 years is a long time, every single place we lived during that time was temporary or transitory, in our minds. We never knew where we'd be in a month or two.  Most were small rental apartments furnished with thrift store junk we'd be happy to leave, and cheap, transportable ikea stuff that could fit in our car.  One was even my parents' spare room, where we'd sleep when we were back in Canada for a weekend.

If I jump back past all of that, our last home is only a 10-minute drive away from our current home.  Not very far, considering the vast sprawl of the city (and its surrounding suburbs) in which we live. 

I'm glad that we're no longer there.  It was our first house, the best we could afford at the time, and we did okay there - created a lot of memories together, hosted some fun parties, grew from virtual children to adults - and I think fondly of it for that reason, but it was too small, too leaky, and just needed much more help than we could afford to give it at the time.  I speak from experience when I say: Beware the "handyman's dream," no matter how handy you may be.

I'm somewhat content in our current house, but not entirely.  I still find myself hesitating for just a moment when typing the word "home" when describing it.  We've been here for over 3 years, we've done some pretty big interior renvations, with all of the work being done by us, our friends, and our family.  We've brought 2 newborn babies into this house, done the subsequent raising of said babies, and in doing so, grown up even more, but still... I can't help but think that there's a home out there for us somewhere else.

One of my goals on my 43things page, which I never visit anymore, is "have a home (not just a house)," and I'm not able to check that one off as "done," yet. 

My first entry, written over a year and a half ago, reads:

We're still in the midst of debate and discussion as to whether we'll move or renovate... the same discussion we've been having for two years now. 

In the meantime, kid#2 sleeps in our room, we continue to use the crappy $49 ikea table (toted home from one of the PA apartments) because we don't want to buy a dining room table that may not fit a new dining room, I've gone 3 years without ordering return address mailing labels (I want the incredibly tacky ones where you do up your whole family in a line of cartoon heads) because we might not use them up before we move, we have no curtains, and all sorts of other TRAVESTIES.

This turned from a quick jotted answer to the qotd to a long pointless ramble about my thoughts on "home."  I'm fighting my usual urge to now start with all the apologies (for being so negative and rambly) and disclaimers (I'm really quite content with most things in my life... something in my nature just wants a permanent place to hang my hat, and the question just stirred that up), but hey, if you ignore the stuff in parentheses, I actually managed to restrain myself!  Go, me!

What are your favorite ways to reduce, reuse & recycle?

Hm.  Not sure how to decide which are my "favourite" ways.  I mean... dividing our household waste into 238 different containers is super and all, but I'm not sure how much fun it is.  I guess I'll list 3 things I do that bring me the most overall satisfaction as well as making a positive impact, at least as far as I know.

Reusable shopping bags

You can buy such great bags online:  Handmade, beautiful, printed with cool patterns or making a statement about anything you can think of.  I salivate over them on a regular basis, but since all the chain stores are jumping on the Go Green bandwagon (the temptation is to roll my eyes and say "it's about time," but really, I'm just happy they're getting with the program - better late than never), they've started selling reusable bags for $1, and I've stocked up. 

It's such a minor change to make, but it makes me feel so good to know my choice has such a positive impact.

Plus, a common excuse explanation that people give for not choosing the environmental route is that it costs more.  I see that in many circumstances it does, but for a buck for a great shopping bag, you can't go wrong.

Reusable beverage containers (preferably non-plastic)

Our family has lots of plastic reusable drink containers, but the plastic is not only environmentally costly to produce, but more and more, I hate thinking about the toxins that may be leaching into our drinks.  We also have a stainless steel travel mug, and I recently bought a stainless steel insulated flask that I've used almost every day since buying it. 

I'm so completely sold that I'm definitely buying more, I just need to decide on which kind.  I wrote recently about being a little wary of the Sigg bottles without more information, but there's another kind called Klean Kanteen which are single-walled stainless steel bottles (you can even get them fitted with a sippy cup lid for little ones). 

Environmental food choices

A lot of things fall into this category, including:

• Buy locally.  I try to do this when possible, but I'm not great at it, I must admit.  I do most of my shopping at major grocery chains, and I don't know how all these buying contracts work, but it seems that even in the height of, say, Ontario strawberry season, they'll have strawberries from California for sale.  I avoid supporting this more obvious kind of idiocy when I can, but the farmer's market only runs in the warm months, and it's kind of a trek from my house, so I don't get all my produce there. 
  
• Buy organic.  I used to do this more, when money was more plentiful around here.  When the cost difference isn't too steep I still buy organic, but a lot of things are just a little too expensive for us right now. 
  
• Go veggie.  Haven't done this, but I don't eat red meat, which I think counts a bit.  I have trouble finding much information on the difference between eating fish and chicken vs. pig and cow (most sites seem to say meat or no meat), but from what I've read, I'm still reducing my global footprint by avoiding cow and pig products.

Okay, I said I'd do 3, but I spent all that time writing the one on food choices before I remembered this one, which is truly fun!  Just as with the reusable shopping bags I mentioned, cloth diapers can mean anything from utilitarian to a total fashion statement! 

Simple pre-folds with a cover to keep baby's clothes dry are an economical, workable, effective choice, no question.   Even so, they're not the diapers your mother used - the diapers come 'folded,' sewn in layers for extra absorbency, no pins needed, and leakproof but breathable covers.

However, go a step further and no joke, shopping for diapers could actually become quite addicting.  An amazing variety of cute patterns, different styles, it's just endless.

You have $100 to spend online in the next hour.  How are you going to spend it?

Well my first inclination when asked questions like this is always books, books, books.  Today, I would treat myself to a stack of parenting books:

• First and foremost, my very own copy of Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn, which I read (and wrote about here) before, but it was a library copy and I'd love one to look through again.
• Adventures in Gentle Discipline by Hilary Flower
• Child of Mine by Ellyn Satter, which addresses feeding your children, and from what I read and hear of it, it advocates taking a deep breath and just relaxing about the whole thing.  A reminder I need - I'm lucky that my toddler is a good eater, so why do I still feel the compulsion to try every dirty trick in the book to make her eat just one more piece of broccoli?  Hopefully this book could finally convince me to let it go.
• Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen, because it's so easy for me to forget not to take everything so seriously!
• The No-Cry Discipline Solution by Elizabeth Pantley, because (a) I read and enjoyed her No-Cry Sleep Solution book, and (b) I hear that this one has a chapter on anger-management for parents, which is something I think is valuable (rather than working so hard to control the child's thoughts and actions, how about working on learning to control our own once in awhile?)
• Parenting from the Inside Out by Daniel Siegel and Mary Hartzell, because I find that the way I would ideally like to parent my children isn't necessarily the way I end up parenting them on a day-to-day basis.  The parenting philosophies that I believe in don't come naturally to me because they weren't the way I was raised (I hear myself saying "because I said so" much too frequently lately), and anything that can help me overcome that would make me very happy.

But considering that I have so many books to read already, and this is just a hypothetical question anyway, so I can cheat and not really harm anyone, I'd like to say that I'd instead go for an Ergo Baby Carrier.  Because considering I can't seem to put the baby down without him crying (although that's a total lie, since he's lying by himself now, sleeping as I type this very entry), I'll never be able to read again without a good back carrier anyway.